Saturday, January 1, 2011

Welcome to 2011

First, I have no pictures.  If you're here looking for adorable kids in their jammies, opening gifts on Christmas morning, you'll have to wait.  I'll get them up soon.  Actually, we didn't even take many pictures this year- so there may or may not be pictures coming soon. 

Second, I have nothing of interest to say.  I suppose, since I'm publishing this post, I should say something...  But I'll be danged if I know what it's going to be.

I guess I could say a loud and hearty "SEE YA!" to 2010.  Don't let the door hit you in the arse on the way out.  As far as years go?  Not a big 2010 fan.

2010 has been a year of "Downhills."  The biggest thing was seeing our business go downhill.  More like it did one of those extreme skiing jumps off the side of a cliff.  As much as I hate to admit this out loud, our family pretty much went broke this year.  Owning a one-horse construction operation in a sucky economy is not a fun thing.  I can think of many things, in fact, that I'd rather do.  Multiple root canals.  Colonoscopies.  Mammograms on both jumblies simultaneously.  Sitting in a vat of maggots.  All of those at the same time.  Worrying over whether or not my children will have a home six months from now, or stressing over stupid little things, like- oh...  feeding my kids- these are not the ways I had hoped to spend my 2010.  We've had to make huge adjustments (many were actually good for us, but still...), and learn to live with a constant knot in our guts, waiting for work to "pick back up."  It hasn't.  The financial headaches have taken a toll in every area of our life.  Every. Area.  If you've been through it, I don't need to say anymore.  You know what I mean.  We aren't completely destitute (yet) and God has really proven His faithfulness to us over and over again in the past year, so I can't really complain.  In fact, I'm truly thankful.  But you know it's my complaining that keeps this blog in business, so... 

My career as a homeschool mom has definitely gone downhill.  But that's really nothing new.  I guess I can't blame that on 2010, although this year has seemed especially hard.  I've thought of giving up many times.  I'm so hard on myself, that I can never know for sure if I really am doing a terrible job homeschooling my children, or if I just feel like I am.

My beautiful figure has gone downhill.  And you know how hot I was before, so that's been a difficult adjustment.  I was so slim and sexy.  Remember how I was constantly being compared to Demi Moore?  Yes, you do.  Think back.  I betcha I'm fatter now than I've ever been.  Either that, or the weight is shifting to other places.  As we speak.  My neck, or chin, or whatever this huge goiter-like lump of fat below my face is called, now has a separate zip code from the rest of my body.  My stomach fat literally hangs down over my C-section scars, thereby hiding them- so... you know... there's something positive.  Except I have to pick up the fat roll to clean underneath.  You think I'm kidding?  Then why am I crying as I type this?

My hairdo went downhill.  For some stupid reason, I cut it all off.  My hair was the one thing about my appearance that I could sometimes make look attractive.  Not anymore.  It blows.  And sucks.  I'm now in the process of growing it out.  This, too, is not fun. 

...Oh. My. Gosh.  You guys.  You know what I just realized?  You know who I look like?  With the fat, and the hair?  CHAZ BONO.

That's me.  I swear.  See that neck/chin thing?  SEE?  That's it!  That's my neck/chin thing!  My real life friends can vouch for me.  Not to dis Mr. Bono, but this is not really the look I've longed to duplicate.  Wow...  This was an epiphany I didn't need.  Now, I really am crying.  I am Chaz Bono, you guys.  Chaz. Bono. 

My health has not only gone downhill, it's gone straight to Hades in the past year.  But that's a whole separate post.  One that I'll get to soon, in fact.  I have things to tell.  Secrets to reveal. 

All in all, I'm thrilled to leave 2010 behind me.  I hope and pray for a happier, healthier, more prosperous year ahead... with less neck/chin.  And I'm wishing that for all of you, too.  All two of you, my precious readers.  Happy 2011!


Anonymous said...

We are birds of feather, dear. My goal for 2011 is to get rid of my extra chins too. I only post photos that somehow mask the massive-ness of my extra flesh in that area, but trust me..I would look very Chaz-like if someone snapped that kind of a photo of me too.

And the broke thing...ya me too. Another thing I need to work on in 2011. I hated 2010 with a passion. Let's just hope this coming year makes it look as bad as it felt.

I just posted about this a post ago on my blog too. :O)

Michelle said...

I know! I just went over and read your blog after posting on mine. We're also similar with the emotional eating thing. With me, every emotion is a reason to eat. If I'm happy, let's celebrate! If I'm depressed, I find my comfort in mac-n-cheese, etc... If I could just learn to eat when I'm hungry- and that's ALL, I'd be a completely different person.

Chandra said...

Can I join you in complaining about all that stuff too? Money in 2010, barely making it. Body, yeah it just keeps getting worse. And no money causes a VERY stressful existence and a stressful marriage. Yeah, yeah I'm grateful for the little money I am making and all that crap. But the other stuff STILL SUCKS!

Hope both of our 2011's are MUCH better.

Anonymous said...

2011 IS going to be a better year, I just know it. For one thing, Paul Ryan is holding the purse strings in the House. And that? Will drive Obama CRAZY. Which will be entertaining if nothing else. :) (See, I know that YOU, my fellow conservative friend, will find this cheering. Nicki and Tracy? Not so much. Sorry girls!)

Eating healthy is hard under normal circumstances. When you are stressed, all the more hard. But we are here to cheer you on. Because you need to be healthy, for your family but more so, just for YOU. Cuz we love you. :) And I swear I'm not eating a handful of m-n-m's as I give you this loving nag. (But don't ask me what I had at lunch time...)

The Chaz thing cracked me up. No way do you look like him/her. And can I just say, I'm praying for Chaz. Because that is one hurting person looking for validation and love and who can blame him/her what with having Cher Remove-A-Rib-To-Look-Thinner for a mom?

ps. Happy New Year. :)

metaphase said...

I wish you only the best for 2011, and we're here to be your biggest cheerleaders! I don't know how you look, but I know you're still funny, smart, and one of my favorite people in blogland!

Anonymous said...

I'm really feeling your homeschool pain. Am I doing an awful job, or do I just think I'm doing an awful job? This year has been so different and it's really thrown me. I'm sorry 2010 was so sucky for you. Hopefully 2011 will be much better!
Oh, and have you thought about putting ads on your blog? I have no idea how much revenue one can actually generate that way, but it might be worth a try? Now I'm just being like a stupid man, trying to solve the problem instead of just being a good shoulder. You can hate me now.

Anonymous said...

I had to stop by after spending an evening with Char from Metaphase. She went on and on about how much she LOVES you and that one of the best Christmas presents she received this year was the fact that you are back to blogging! I think she may be your biggest fan. So, I wanted to encourage you and tell you that you are making a difference in this world! Especially the world of bloggers! Lots of people have taken notice to what a fun and smart person you are and you inspire people to be themselves and be better parents. So “yay” to you! I look forward to also following your blog and pray your New Year is FULL of blessings!

Michelle said...

WOW! Compliments don't get any better than that! Not sure that I deserve the praise, but THANK YOU! Your comment made my day. I read it to my kids and said, "See? SOMEONE thinks I make a difference, dangit!" lol!

Anonymous said...

I've already told you in e-mail now much 2010 sucked. I've been meaning to put it in blog form (well, some of it anyway) but I still haven't gotten to it. But you, you are so on top of things! At least you have that going for you, right?

And, to you and mrsbroccoliguy, I don't have the energy to engage in political debates right now (like we wouldn't have to control the purse strings so tightly if we weren't continuing tax cuts for the stinkin' rich), but please, please, please just promise me you won't contribute in any way, shape, or form to get Sarah Palin any where near the White House! :)

Michelle said...

I don't believe S.P. is any more (or less) prepared for the White House than Obama was. ;P How's that? Make you breathe any easier?