Monday, April 25, 2011

Back from the brink of death...

Okay, I might exaggerate just a bit, but I'm back from the brink of feelin' really, really crappy, and that just doesn't roll off the tongue the way 'brink of death' does. 

The only bad thing is...  I'm gearing up to get sick again.  I can feel it coming back.  I'm trying to tell it to go somewhere else, but the crud isn't listening to me.

A few weeks ago, I was feeling so icky that I was seriously wondering if I'd end up in the ER.  I couldn't breathe.  I found out the following week that it was a(nother) respiratory infection, but at the time, I honestly didn't know what was happening to me.  I just knew it was scary.  My lips were getting numb and tingly.  My head was making this cool whooshing noise along with the sound of my heartbeat.  Everything sounded far away.  I was so, so lightheaded.  It was nuts.  If I wouldn't have thought I was dying, it would have been kind of fun.  Oh, except for the lack of air.  That wasn't fun.  At all.  After being sick all week, I started getting "abnormally uncomfortable" on a Friday afternoon.  Of course.  I resisted going to urgent care or the ER (who wants to pay that bill?), and decided I'd make myself hold out until Monday to see the doctor.   Longest weekend of my life.

By Monday morning, I thought I could breathe a tiny bit better and I'd get well on my own, so why be a pansy and call the doctor?  Why, you ask? (actually, no- you didn't ask.  I did.  But stop trying to interrupt the flow of the story with your goofy semantics, please).  As I was saying...  Why call the doctor if I might be getting a tiny bit better on my own?  Because I woke up with my eyes glued shut with yucky eye goop, and then I spied myself in the mirror, and thought I looked a tiny bit demon-possessed.  And...???  Oh, yeah...  my temperature was 103.  I'm too old to have 103 degree fevers and shake them off like Wonder Woman.  In fact, let's just decide today that I'm too old to do anything like Wonder Woman anymore, okie dokie?

So...  The doctor was called and I was seen.  I had: An ear infection, respiratory infection, and pink eye.   Who gets pink eye at 44 years old, especially without getting it from their kids first?  Has that ever been done?  When I told the doctor about my awesome weekend without oxygen, and trying not to go to the ER, he said, "Yeah, you shouldn't do that."

The pink eye is still here (it's viral- lasts longer), and as I said above, I'm gearing up for another round of chest crud.

In spite of these hardships, I am bravely arising from my sick bed to give a few updates (cause I'm awesome that way)...

First and foremost, I need to bring you guys up to speed on Mike.  He's not going into the Army.  He was supposed to leave tomorrow, but a couple weeks ago his medical file got "red flagged."  I don't know if any of you will remember this, but he injured his knee during his first football practice of Soph. year, and has had occasional problems with it ever since.  I guess that was enough to raise an eyebrow with the Army because it was never "fixed."  So the recruiter told Mike he could reapply (or re-enlist?? Whatevs), but he'd have to provide full documentation that the injury has been fixed.  So...  I'm a happy(er) mom. 

I didn't have peace about him going at all.  I feel better about Evan's decision to enlist, just because he's talked about this for two years now and, although I don't like it, I know he's thought it through and is sure it's what he wants.  With Mike, on the other hand, it seemed almost as if he got the idea one day and signed up the next.  I've been worried ever since.  So I'm sort of feeling as if the knee thing is God's way of answering my prayers.  Now, Mike just needs to figure out what he does want to do and set some goals to get there.  He's a little aimless right now. 

Onto another kid...  I didn't get a post done for Bri's bday.  I felt bad about that, but I was preoccupied with fighting for oxygen at the time.  I'll have to get a pic of her up soon.  She did have a lovely birthday and she and I got to have a nice (belated) day out together, which was a lot of fun.  I also took both girls out just recently to see Soul Surfer.  We loved it!  Good, uplifting movie with a strong spiritual message.

Next...  I've had a few people asking about our financial situation.  Thank you for caring.  No, things haven't changed.  We've had a meeting with an attorney and are in the process of filling out a ton of paperwork.  We're still managing to juggle and shuffle enough to keep our heads above water and the kids fed (with a little help from an overly-generous family member), so we're hanging in there.  Don't worry about us.  Please pray, if God would have you do so, for Darrell and his job.  The little job he's had going is about to wrap up and there's nothing lined up to start afterward.  Some of you have let me know you are praying for us and I can't tell you how much that means to us.  It makes all of it easier to bear, knowing that our names are being lifted up before the Lord.  Thank you.

We had a very nice Easter.  Hope you did, too.  And Sam's second Adoption Day is coming up on the 27th, so there'll be another celebration in a couple days.  April is full of days that involve cake or sweets for us.  How can a fat chick be expected to lose weight in April around here?

And speaking of my weight...  My readers came out in droves to answer my little poll.  Do you see that up there?  A whopping fifteen people voted (or my three readers each voted five times).   I try not to let the fame go to my head, but it's hard.  Thank you for voting.  The responses were only slightly more in favor of starting another blog, so I don't know.  I may get a wild hair to do that one of these days.  I'll keep you posted. 

First, I need to go buy a bag of cough drops and a jar of Vick's.  Again.

Thursday, April 7, 2011

Dude, you're confused...

As you can see, I've moved the poll (about starting another blog) to the sidebar, since the votes are still pouring in. I mean, it just doesn't stop, people. You know, you often hear celebrities talk about how hard it is to be so famous, and I really can see they're right...  I'm just getting pounded by these things (that's what she said).  The count is in the tens, now, so it's quite exciting and clearly anybody's guess how it will come out.  You still have time to answer, if you haven't already (meaning, please, please answer my sad little poll.  This is me, on my knees, begging- oh, and just ignore the creaking noise.  It's normal.  It's just hard for a fat girl to get down on her knees.  And, there' no guarantee she's gettin back up, either).  Come on, people!  Let's silence all those naysayers (I think there were like 2 of 'em... maybe 3) who said I could never reach the masses and be the incredibly successful blogger that I am today!  Let them see that literally tens of people would want to read what I say.  TENS!  That's like...  around a hundred, just about.

Anyway...  Massive, celebrity-like, blog popularity aside, I do actually have something to tell you today.  Something funny.  This will be a shorter-than-usual story, but too cute not to share.  And, let's be honest, you've earned a short post or two from me, haven't you, my long-suffering little friend?   I was going to post it only on FB, but didn't want to embarrass one of my boys, and you'll see why in just a sec... 

Okay, now for the Story of the Day, titled:
Dude, you're confused... 
(Dim lights, begin music)...

The other day, while sitting on our couch next to Sam, one of my older sons (I will refrain from humiliating the boy by revealing his identity, although I'd like to.  I really would) engaged in a certain... oh, let's say, a 'flatulatory behavior, ending  with a thunderous release of what can only be assumed was a fetid, evil presence.Are we on the same page, here?  It was a belch that took a wrong turn, in other words; a canary killer; the song of the South; an air biscuit; the barking spider's mating call...  a *F*A*R*T. 

And the big kid obviously did it. There was much smirking and proud snickering involved.  Sam was right there, but he was completely innocent of the heinous, disgusting act of biochemical warfare perpetrated upon the whole Fam Damily, leaving the room aglow in the haze of a thick, neon-green fog, which, incidentally, made the dog's hair fall out...

This sequence of events makes sense to you, yes?  I guess it didn't to Sam.  He heard the noise and suffered the following assault on his other senses, and he said...

"Uh-oh! I pooped!"

Wednesday, April 6, 2011


Happy Birthday to one of the sweetest, most beautiful girls God ever made! 
You are so precious to me.   Hope today is filled with blessings for you!

Sunday, April 3, 2011


I've been kicking around the idea for a while, of keeping a separate blog/journal on health and weight stuff, to talk about topics relating to that and to track my progress as I try to lose weight and reclaim my health, but I keep procrastinating- wondering if it would be of interest to anyone but me, or just a waste of time.  Then, a friend suggested I do it, so I'm just wondering... 

If I started a second blog to talk about and track my progress on health and weight related issues, would you read it?