I noticed it's been one year exactly since starting this blog. I never would have guessed a year ago, as I sat down to write my first post, that I'd still be waiting for our adoption to happen and wondering if it's going to happen at all. I really, truly thought I'd be sitting here with a smelly, snot-nosed kid on my lap by now, and loving every minute of it. I know I'm not in that boat by myself- many of you involved in a VN adoption are still waiting and wondering with us. I feel for all of you. I continue to hope everything will work out, even though that hope is becoming harder and harder to sustain. At least this blog has been a lot of fun over the past year, and has provided a great escape from dwelling on my Adoption Mama Trauma, as well as a great opportunity to connect with new and interesting people (that means YOU... maybe. lol!).
On the adoption front, there's still not much to report. We talked to our agency's coordinator for their African American Infant program and didn't come away from the conversation feeling very hopeful. She wasn't trying to sound discouraging, but she did say our age and family size would work against us in that program as well. Geez! Aren't old, tired, busy, over-worked farts able to love and parent a child?
Anyhoooo... we're still contemplating what we'll do. Darrell still wants to leave it in God's hands and wait it out to the end with Vietnam and see what happens. So this is me, waiting patiently.
Onto other things... The latest development around here has me yanking my hair out. Remember I was telling you about pulling off the ultimate shopping trifecta when I found the perfect dress, shoes, and jewelry for my son's wedding??? Well, scratch that. It all has to go back to the store and I have to start again. The bride decided she no longer approves of the color of my dress (champagne), since her dress is ivory. The dress I bought is much darker than ivory (champagne is actually more of a dark goldish beige, if you don't know), and I didn't realize it was a wedding faux pas to wear something in the same color family as the bride. I just thought it wasn't supposed to be the same color exactly. I knew enough not to choose white, ivory, black, or blood red... Beyond that? I'm clueless, apparently. I found something online that said champagne was considered a neutral color that is "always appropriate with any color scheme" for mothers to wear. Whatever. I'm going to sue that website if I can't return all my stuff. More about that in a sec...
In addition to my own stupidity and lack of fashion sense, size and cost issues are also causing me trouble in trying to find an "acceptable" dress. Unfortunately, there is not an abundance of color choices in bigger sizes, or on the department store racks- period. Is everybody else's mom a size 8 or something? If so, then I'm sorry but I hate everyone else's moms. I saw several pretty colors that would work, but they didn't come in a size "Horse" (however, I have lost 23 lbs. so far. Yea me! So put that in your skinny pipe and smoke it, all you size 8 moms). A lot of the mom dresses in my size look like old lady stuff. Who decided that fat chicks want to dress like they're 88 years old? I don't wanna look like somebody's grandma (even though I am), dangit. I want to look young, hip, and classy, like Paris or Britney.
...Kidding. Just seeing if you're still paying attention. If I go the Bridal Shop route and get measured for a dress in the size, color, and style I want, the cost seems to increase exponentially. That's a problem. It's just not a good time for us right now for a lot of extra expenses. Actually, I don't recall when it's ever been a good time for a lot of extra expenses. And I feel guilty spending bajillions of dollars on something I'll probably only wear once (unless the dress code at Walmart suddenly changes). Ahhh, Mom Guilt... Dontcha love it?
I need some of you awesomely fashion-forward ladies to set me straight. If it's considered inappropriate for the moms to wear champagne, why do so many mother-of-the-bride/groom dresses come in that color? Why are the racks marked "Mother-of-the-Bride" full of champagne dresses? That doesn't make sense. Someone should look into that and get back to me. Call your congressmen and senators, please.
Back to returning my stuff: What makes it extra cruddy is that I had my perfect shoes on for all of 3 whole minutes to give Darrell the full effect, but somehow the bottoms still appear worn and I'm afraid it may be difficult to return them. Yea! They are not cheap shoes, either. In fact, I've never spent this much on a pair of shoes before in my life. I decided to go ahead and splurge since they are such a perfect match to the dress, and they are gorgeous, and they fit my wide monkey feet with no unsightly spill over on the sides, and they are comfortable. I knew it was all too good to be true! Dang (or feel free to insert some other word that will probably come much closer to the word I'm actually thinking)... I hope the store doesn't give me too much trouble. Yesterday, I ordered swatches of all the bride's colors, so hopefully next time I can go to the store feeling more confident about choosing something that won't clash with everyone else. But I still ain't happy. Nope- not at all. Can you blame me?
Looks like I better go get my Spanx back out of the drawer. Again, I must say Dang.
Before I go, I need to request your prayers for Alex. We have to take him up to KC for some unpleasant medical tests on Thursday. I just wish God would either heal him or allow the doctors to find the problem and get it FIXED once and for all. Wednesday is also not going to be a very fun day for him, as he has to go through all the prep stuff for the test. Yuck. Poor kid. We would all appreciate your prayers! Thanks so much!